When I was younger I wasn’t able to tolerate any type of praise. I would apologize and belittle it, and I was always convinced some sort of mistake had been made. Now: not so much.

Now, I am like a dog.. If you tell me that I did good for getting the ball, I will go get it again and again and again – no matter which thorny bush you throw it into.. This is actually extremely embarrassing when you think about it, because (like so much else I do) it just goes to show an incredibly small amount of self worth. Or an ego that is incredibly large (but that’s a story for another day).

I have a theory that all of my bad self esteem goes back to that time in 2nd grade when we were playing pigerne efter drengene which translated directly means the girls after the boys. The rules were pretty simple: the girls had to try to catch the boys and when they did, they kissed them.

The boys of course had to pretend that they thought it was extremely disgusting, but all around the playground you saw guys tripping, running into a girl by mistake or just running in an absurdly slow fashion. Except the guys who were running from me. I can still see the fright in their eyes as they were running for their lives, rather risking to sprain a muscle than a kiss from me – and through that entire summer of pigerne efter drengene I never got to kiss one boy.

All through my life, no matter how successful or attractive I later become, I have still had that image in my head of Niclas, who I believe was my #1 crush at the time, running like a madman to avoid getting kissed by me. But praise makes the image blurry. Getting told I am good at something makes me feel that even if Niclas wouldn’t want to kiss me I am at least appreciated for being the person who will always get the ball.

I am not sure on about how it is in English, but in Danish the “proper” word for certain minorities change every couple of years. As an example I wouldn’t know what to call a person with Down’s syndrome anymore because whatever I choose it will probably be politically incorrect.

I kinda feel the same way about the word “single” (the two probably cannot really be compared I am doing it anyway). The word is obsolete and I cringe at the use of the word as a marketing category: there are single girls, single literature, single vacations, single ready meals and single brad pans. And built into the word there’s an implicit premise that one should be “double” to be whole, and that it’s only possible when you have a man in your life.

I especially hate the fact that being a single woman surely must mean that you are constantly on the prowl for a man.

When I’m asked to describe myself whether I am a man or not is one of the most important things. When I have stated that I am not, then it’s  if I have a man or not. It’s tiring and I sometimes feels like it can build a cliff between me and my non-single friends.

Often I have to remind myself that being single doesn’t translate into being weird or unwanted – because that is what the word “single” carries with it. I guess I would just like a word for my civil status that doesn’t imply that I am desperate, lonely and/or dysfunctional.

• Bracelets
  I really feel like the bracelet is the most stupid kind of jewellery. It’s like a watch, but it doesn’t give any information. And in my world that is kind of the purpose of a watch.
• Shoes
  Though I understand the purpose of the shoe I do not get the (female) obsession with this particular accessory. Who the hell cares what you put on your feet. You don’t even really see them.
• Tooth-piercings
  Just like you don’t look particularly nice with spinach in your teeth this is not working out for you either.
• Thong
  I guess it might be flattering in theory, but in realty; not so much.
• False or unnaturally long fingernails
  It’s so impractical it’s a joke. I just don’t get why you’d want something that makes everyday life so difficult. To me it’s kind of pathetic. It also makes you look like a prostitute.

Also: “I think accessories are like nipples. Two of ‘em are totally cool but any more than that and you look ridiculous.” J-Money